I mentioned some of this in a previous blog post, but thought I'd go more in depth here. After having our 2 girls, my husband and I were content. We had 2 children, and thought that possibly, we'd have one more - LATER in the future. Another baby was not on our minds - we had a 4.5 year old, and an almost 2 year old. It was a Friday night when it hit me, I was late. As I mentioned before in a previous post, this is not uncommon for me, but I felt "strange." I decided to pick up a cheap test at the dollar store, "Just in case." I was home with the 2 girls, and Vic was at youth group, so I thought I'd take it. I was SHOCKED when it came back positive. SHOCKED. And, then scared. I had no idea how Vic would take the news. I tried waiting until he came home to tell him - but I just couldn't. I was shaking. So, the girls and I drove over to Church. Vic was surprised to see me, but that surprise grew to concern when I asked to speak to him privately. Once I got him alone, I rambled on about how I was late, blah blah blah, and then I showed him the test. He looked at me for a minute (I must have been as white as a ghost), and he started laughing! He was HAPPY!! REALLY HAPPY!!! It was then, that I allowed myself to get happy too. It was sooo not planned, our last 2 pregnancies were achieved using fertility drugs! But we welcomed the idea of a new baby with joy. I then called my Mom and then my sister who were both shocked, but really happy as well. My sister was pregnant and had always wanted for us to be pregnant together.
I had my first OB checkup and learned that my due date was 12-11-10. I thought that was the coolest due date :) We told the girls they were going to be big sisters. We told EVERYONE. We had never had any problems in the past, and we had no reason to suspect that we would. That's when I started spotting. Vic was at Church, and I called him and then called my OB. I put the girls to bed, and just laid there praying, pleading with God for everything to be ok. It wasn't. At my appointment the next day they gave us the news - I had lost the baby. I was so sad - I couldn't understand why God would give us this baby - WITHOUT any use of fertility drugs, only to take him away. It was hard for me.
After I had healed from the miscarriage (physically and mentally), we talked about having a third baby. We decided to leave it up to the Lord for a while, but after a couple of months, nothing had happened. Finally, at Thanksgiving, we decided that we would "try" for another baby. Shortly before Christmas, I had that "feeling" again. I picked up a pregnancy test, but waited until I was alone (at Church actually - doing some work for the preschool) to take it. Almost immediately, it turned positive. I wasn't surprised at all - I just had this feeling that I was! I wrote a cute little poem, and went home and video taped my husband reading the poem. It ended like this, "In fact, we love each other so much, that next Christmas, the number of our children will be 3." He was shocked! No fertility drugs again, AND! The first month trying. We were both a little more hesitant and decided to only tell very close friends and immediate family. (We told my family with a cute little slide show!)
Shortly after Christmas, I had my 6 week ultrasound. The technician doing the ultrasound got very quiet and said to me, "I'm so sorry, I'm not seeing a heartbeat." I immediately started crying. I was by myself (my husband was covering for me at work). I felt so scared, so alone and so sad. I saw my Doctor that day, immediately after my ultrasound and she made me feel a bit better. She explained that I the pregnancy was still viable, but that it appeared that I was earlier in my pregnancy than originally thought. That the date of conception was later and that the heart had not yet fully formed. She told me the date of conception was 12-11-10 (the due date of the baby I had lost. How cool is God?!). She told me to come back in a week for a repeat ultrasound. The next week, there was a strong heartbeat! The pregnancy went well, no problems, no complications, and NO morning sickness!
Keeland was born by planned c-section on August 23rd, 2011. He was a whopping 9lbs, 7oz. He is the most sweet, funny, giggly baby boy. He fills our hearts with laughter and love every day. I can't imagine our life without him.
We're not 100% sure that our family is complete, but for now, we're content.
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